MNCT 625- no complaints!

[Terri Carey]

So how many of you are willing to try the complaint fast?  Any examples of how you have turned a complaint into a creation?  Please share!

Terri

[aniinl]

You know, sometimes I "notice" something and then I really choose not to complain about it. Funnily enough, the first thought that always crosses my mind then, is "Other people would get upset about this now."  Maybe I really just want to be different, but then again - whatever works!

I have to say that I'm quite relaxed in a lot of ways nowadays (and in others not) - I'm not sure if this happened since I read this tip from Michael the first time around (or in his book? I know I've seen it before.) or when I heard the quote "Nobody wins friends by winning an argument." the first time. All I know is that I wasn't always like that 

I had a specific case this week when I got a call (after ages) from a friend, who clearly only got in touch with me because she wanted something from me. I noticed it, but I chose not to make it a big deal, because I thought, sometimes we do need a reason to get in touch again and I'm happy she found a reason and made contact again. We had a fantastic evening out, had lots of fun, noticed how both our businesses are overlapping in some way and agreed to exchange expertise. She will help me with something and I will help her, so neither of us will have to hire someone.
 
So far, she's only been "taking" and "didn't have time" to give much yet... I'm noticing it, but I'm not complaining.. I know that something good will come from it. Maybe she really doesn't have time. Maybe she's working for me somewhere in the background where I can't see it. I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. Until then I enjoy her inspiration and happiness about what I'm doing for her (which really doesn't take me a lot of effort or time).

Michael - thanks so much for the link to acomplaintfreeworld.org! I've never heard about this before and actually also never saw anyone with a purple bracelet but I love what I read there and I've ordered the teacher's package right away! I'm not a teacher, but for a long time I've been looking for something that I could introduce to schools - classes or workshops that teach kids or teenagers a more positive outlook or some people skills. Something, that nobody taught us in school. This programme looks like a fantastic start to me!

Anja

PS - I read the PS about the Creative Leadership in Vilnius - once your in Europe, can't you come to Amsterdam again and do that one here, too? 

 

[Tomwalked]

Yeah... thanks for the link to complaintfreeworld.com...

Here's the thing. (or here is *a* thing) It seems to me, at least to some extent "complaining is in the eye of the beholder".

Now, there are clearly people that LOVE to complain... and to me it just feels like such a drain - both to complain AND to listen to complaining.

Yesterday was a "complaint-free" day for me.
I am installing an art piece at a clients house - there are lots of workmen there doing various things at the same time.

I was about an hour and a half later than I said I would arrive - he was at work so I didn't need to call and say I was late.

When he got home from work I was still there finishing up.
I am a guy that likes to be on time, to do things in the time expected and still remain flexible when things go "differently than expected".

So, when he showed up - after a short chat... I started to explain, and apologize for still being there when he arrived.
"All three of my errands this morning took about twice as long as I expected so I got here about an hour and a half late."

the client was great about it... "oh no worries, it happens, I understand" that kind of thing.

It didn't feel like a complaint coming out... but it was clearly received (albeit gracefully) that way.

[Anja]

Hi together,

I really enjoyed this tip! Exploring the link to acomplaintfreeworld.org I took the chance and ordered the book and a couple of bracelets.
I shared the tip with some of my colleagues who first somewhat expressed their doubts and slightly hinted to me nuts but then found it incredibly funny to point out whenever I complained.
After a short while this turned into everyone pointing out to everyone else whenever we hear a complaint and remind each other to start all over again. We are really having fun doing that 

All of a sudden all these complaints about one of our software programms being so slow turn into joyous calls that it great to have time to get a cup of tea or coffee have a short chat 

So lets see if we can make it the first complaintfree department in our company 
Have a nice evening
Anja

[Terri Carey]

I love that you got others involved! I have a big family - maybe I should try it there!

[Lennydw67]

Ok my Complaint Fast starts tomorrow!!

I'll settle for a getting through a day first....lol

Bring it on!

[Lennydw67]

ok I'm half way through my first day!

It's going ok so far......although I did start replying to a txt from my girl friend in which she was saying her day was going slow and I had started to remark in my reply that mine day hadn't even started yet due to my work a late shift and generally moan about that.....I had actually typed the message out and then deleted it back and wrote about all the little jobs I had got done around the house this morning and wished my GF and a fanticastic day!!

And you know I feel really great today! absolutely buzzing!

Lenny

[Tomwalked]

Michael & Terri


 this homework is too Hard!!!


waaaaahhhhh

[aniinl]

Tom!

You're complaining already at 03:28 AM?
 
You know, you can reduce your complaint-time by adding more sleep-time in your days 

Anja

[aniinl]

Anja!

Don't be fooled by the time display in the posts! Where he lives it's not even the 17th of September yet!

Anja

[aniinl]

Ah! OK.

Anyway. I confirm that sleeping longer reduces the time for complaints.

[Jay Budzynski]

Hi

I have an issue with this- I don't complain- even though this now as just been classed as a complaint- lol I learned a long time ago to either do thing's or not do thing's and if you change you mind in the process- then just to allow it to be ok-

Something I have noticed though- is if ones attention is either past focused or future focused- then the skill of being able to complain is enhanced leap and bonds-

J 

[Michael Neill]

My son actually acts as my 'complaint alarm clock'.  I had thought this had become a habit for me until my son complained that every time he walked by Nina and I playing scrabble (our tea time ritual) all he ever heard was the two of us complaining about what lousy letters we had! 

btw, another fun way of playing with this in a family (courtesy of Tony Robbins) is instituting 'the whine of the day'.  Yesterday's was "why do I have to go to bed so early", done in an appropriately whiney voice.  After declaring it the whine of the day it takes all the fun out of it by making it funny - a variation on what Adler called 'spitting in the soup'...

Happy exploring,
michael

[Terri Carey]

I love the whine of the day. When I had gall bladder surgery and was rather sick in the hospital, my sister sent me flowers with a note that said Quit your whining!  Made me laugh so hard my stomach hurt! It still hangs on my fridge - reminding me that even if we have a good reason to whine it's still possible not to!

[Lennydw67]

Ok  I managed a day of No Complaints......and it was good......I've not been able to do a full day since then but I have certainly been complaining less.

Ok the place where I have noticed the most positive effect is on the golf course........ Im a keen golfer and have played off a single figure handicap for most of the 10 years I have been playing.....however for the last coule of years I have been steadiley going up and I now have a 12 handicap.....anyway.......golf for my is an emoitional roller coaster for me .....if I hit a good shot I feel great....if I get a bit of bad luck like a dodgy bounce into the rough, or land in a divot I start to feel really hard done by and basically complain all round the course.....because obviously feelling bad is the best way to turn your game around isn't?  errr no......so anyway I tried the no complaints thing and at first it was tough....really tough.....but then I have had a lot of practice at complaining so it would be?  now I had some bad luck early in the round, which I compounded with a few stray shots...normally I would then begin call myself all sorts of terrible names but I didn't and I did  feel bad....I mean yeah I wasn't happy about hitting bad shots but i didn't get dragged down and I found I recovered much quicker from the bad spells in the round and overall I played a lot better than I have in months!  And I'm really looking forward to playing next week especially not complaining and just gettin on with it!

[aniinl]

I got my purple bracelet shipment this week!

Anjali, did you get yours? Have you started to use them at work? Let us know the feedback!
I will also introduce them when working with teams, I think.
I'm planning some workshops also, for people to become a little more positive and I will hand them out at the end of it. It's such a nice anker and reminder to keep you on track...

Plus, I also like that they are totally in the fashion colour of this Fall... 

Anja

[Anja]

Hi Anja,

yes!! received my bracelets aswell :-)!! And really like the colour aswell (it's my favourite anyway)... my boss is really impressed on how many ways I find to dress in matching colours to the bracelet 
For whatever reason he refuses to wear one himself -some stupid excuse about the colour not matching his teint and not for boys ... - men...
Poor guy, must be really difficult for him to work with my department where people just do not play the complaint game anymore and therefore "spoil" the usual fun in meetings... just sitting there and smiling.... ... no complaints...

But seriously he is fantastic and very open to all the "strange" ideas I somewhat infect other people since I came back from the workshop with Michael.

Some of my colleagues quit finding the complaint fast to difficult but they still have great fun to point out as soon as a complaint accidentaly slippes my mouth... :-)
So we are still having fun with this tip :-)

It's absolutely worth the try and even people refusing the very idea of the tip when I tell them for to stop complaining is impossible come back some time later ... complaining that this idea somewhat kept popping up in there minds and they had to give it a try but failed which is entirely my fault because I told them .... but promising they'll try again

Though there are days I find it incredibly hard to stick to it it is amazing how much fun this fast is 

I'll keep trying....
to stick to the fast !!
... and dress in matching colours to the bracelet 

Have a great sunday
Love
Anja

[Anja]

Good morning erverybody  ,

anyone still up for the complaint fast??? How is your progress??
I have still a way to go until I reach the 21 days but still find it inspiring !! :-)
What I find most awesome is how many people you tell about this join the idea!!
Seems to be a very infectious sort of idea

Amazing how many complaints have not been made in the past few weeks just because a lot of friends and colleagues join the complaint fast

What are your experiences??

Have a nice day and a good start into the new week !
Anja

[Lennydw67]

I'm still do the complaint fast..............3 days is my best so far.

I did email all my collegues at work the complaint fast and my boss loved it and challenged the whole team to a complaint fast.  It was a lot of fun.

I do still complain though, however, when I realise I am complaining.........I have to laugh to myself because realise I'm just moaning and not creating, and then focus my attention on something more productive.