Nothing hampers our quest for happiness, success and well-being
more than the supposition that if we haven't already attained
our goals for our hearts, minds, and bodies, we will need a
giant leap to reach them. Practice, on the other hand, is very
democratic: It works for any of us, no matter where we start.
Incremental transformation is the most reliable, lasting, and
discrimination-free way we've found of attaining any level of
enlightenment.
When I was a child, there was a rumor going around the school
yard that depending on which thumb was on top when you folded
your hands with interlacing fingers, it meant you were gay. I
didn't know what 'gay' meant, but I could tell by the facial
expressions and tonality of the people saying it that it was a
bad thing I didn't want to be. (And no, for the record, I no
longer think that - but bear with me - I'm telling a story!)
While I no longer remember which thumb it was, I was horrified
to discover that I had the gay thumb, and immediately made plans
to pack up all my worldly belongings into a small shopping bag
and head for the Far East where people with all kinds of thumbs
could live together in peace and harmony. However, after a
long and heartfelt talk with my favorite teddy bear, I decided
that rather than run away, I would face up to my demons and
force my thumbs to behave like the good heterosexual digits I
knew them to be.
I embarked on a program of re-conditioning my body to behave in
a new way. Each morning, I would consciously interlace my
fingers at least 100 times, being sure to place the 'non-gay'
thumb on top. At first, it felt incredibly odd to connect my
hands in the 'wrong' way. But after only a few mornings, it
began to feel more and more normal. At some point in the first
two weeks, I closed my eyes and brought my hands together.
When I opened my eyes, the heterosexual thumb was on top!
I had done it - I had changed 'normal' and 'comfortable' simply
by consciously repeating a few new behaviors on a regular
basis. And despite the collection of show tunes and Barbara
Streisand records gathering dust in my closet, I have a wife and
three kids to show for my troubles...
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Today's Experiment:
--------------------
1. Choose a quality or trait you would like to cultivate in your
own life.
Examples:
love, peace, patience, focus, balance, faith, hope, etc.
2. What could you do each day (even if it's just for a few
minutes a day) to begin real-izing (making real) that quality or
trait in your own life?
Examples:
Loving kindness -
I could start (and/or end) my day with a heart meditation,
perform 5 deliberate acts of random kindness each day, make a
point of telling each member of my family I love them at least
once a day, etc.
Focus -
I could practice counting up in my mind from 1 (2, 3, etc.) and
notice how high I get before I get distracted, then return to 1
and begin again
Confidence -
I could spend a few minutes each day remembering times I've felt
confident and 'stepping back in to them' so I see what I saw,
hear what I heard, and feel what I felt. I could take 5 minutes
a day to 'act as if' I was a confident person, standing the way
I would stand, moving the way I would move, and speaking the
way I would speak if I was already confident.
Have fun, learn heaps and remember - practice makes practice!
With love,
michael
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WANT TO LEARN MORE?
======================
Here are some of my favorite resources for putting the power of
incremental transformation to work in your own life:
Books and e-programs
*Change Your Life in Seven Days by Paul McKenna
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/1400082870/geniuscatalys-21
*It's a Meaningful Life - It Just Takes Practice By Bo Lozoff
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0140196242/geniuscatalys-20
*A Rich Man's Secret by Ken Roberts
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1567185800/geniuscatalys-20
*The Success Made Fun one year e-program by Michael Neill and
Michele Lisenbury Christensen
http://www.geniuscatalyst.com/public/cafepublic.php
*You Can Have What You Want by Michael Neill
http://www.geniuscatalyst.com/public/whatyouwant.php
Related Tips and Audio
Members of the inner circle of the Solutions Café will also
enjoy these related tips and audio selections:
*Change Your Life in One Hour w/Paul McKenna (audio)
*The Five Secrets of Making Success Fun
*Habitforce
*Life Long Learning w/Kim Hare (audio)
*The Success Made Fun one year e-program
(included with your membership!)
You can join the inner circle of the Café at:
http://www.geniuscatalyst.com/public/cafepublic.php
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